Music To My Ears — Stayin’ Alive

A couple of weeks ago, I was especially pissed off at cancer. I’m always pissed off at cancer, in truth, but this was a particularly bad week. I felt like if I heard one more bit of news about a friend who had a recurrence or a new occurence or mets or a suspicious imaging result or needed an emergency test or lost someone to cancer or had to have prophylactic surgery or surgery to fix previous surgery that didn’t work, I was going to implode. Added to that were a few bits I read about a couple of ill-informed fundraising efforts that focused on raising money for what were, in my opinion, all the wrong things in all the wrong ways. I sat reading Facebook updates and emails with tears running down my face. I sat there thinking that none of these particular fundraising efforts were destined to save anyone’s life, cure anybody, or prevent anyone from getting cancer. I felt heart-broken, frustrated, helpless and angry. I kept thinking that instead of focusing on saving the ta-ta’s, we ought to be focusing on staying alive. I was, to coin a phrase, beside myself.

But, being the Accidental Amazon, I became inspired, as I so often do, to tap my admittedly warped imagination and create something out of my frustration. And, as I’ve done many times before — and as my father used to do when he was the lead singer of his own band many moons ago — I decided to rewrite some song lyrics. Call me the Weird Al Yankovic of cancer. But it seemed natural to me to think of the Bee Gees’ song, Stayin’ Alive, and just tweak it a little. I won’t bore you with all the technical deficits I had to address to cobble together a recording studio of sorts at my desk, but here is the result of my redirected frustrations. With enormous apologies to Barry Gibb. Honestly, I don’t know how he managed that falsetto thing.

Stayin’ Alive — The Amazon’s Remix*

Well you can tell
by the way I use my walk
I’m an Amazon,
no time to talk.
Treatment harsh & fear untamed,
I’ve been kicked around
since cancer came.

And now it’s not all right, it’s not ok
and you may look the other way
or you can try to understand
A cure is what we must demand.

Whether you’re a brother
or whether you’re a mother
you’re stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive.
Too many are dyin’
while the rest of us are tryin’
to be stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive
Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin’ alive.

Well now I get low and I get high
And if I can’t get either, I really try
to live each moment, embrace each day,
so I don’t get down & lose my way.

You know it’s all right, it’s ok,
I’ll live to see another day.
But we must try to understand
A cure is what we all demand.


It might recur here,
It might spread somewhere,
Somebody help me, yeah.

Don’t want it nowhere,
somebody cure me,
Somebody help me, yeah.

Well, I can tell
by the way you talk the talk
You’ve been down this road,
you’ve walked the walk.
I know you feel like the future’s gray
When you just don’t know
if you’ll be all okay.

But now it’s all right, it’s ok
‘Cause I won’t look the other way,
’cause we can make them understand
a cure is what we all demand.


We’re going nowhere
somebody help us,
somebody find a cure.

It must be somewhere
There’s gotta be a cure.

We’re getting nowhere
somebody help us,
somebody find a cure.

It must be somewhere
There’s gotta be a cure.

*Thanks to The Bee Gees, to for the instrumental version of “Stayin’ Alive,” and to NCH Software for their MixPad program.

It definitely screams to be turned into a video, but that might take me a little longer…

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This entry was written by Kathi, posted on Tuesday, March 29, 2011 at 04:03 am, filed under Art & Music, Attitude, Play, Survivorship and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink . Post a comment below or leave a trackback: Trackback URL.

19 Responses to “Music To My Ears — Stayin’ Alive”

  1. Well done Kathi! Made me smile this morning! Thank You!

  2. you’ve been reading my mail
    great job!

  3. I want to see that video! It might have to be recorded in WDC at the NBCC conference…

  4. Truly wonderful! May everyone who gets this horrible disease have half the courage, in site and optimism you do. Kudos to all that you do. Thanks!

  5. Love it!

    When I was recovering from surgery (while going through chemo) I used to sing “Remission” to the tune of “Tradition” from Fiddler on the Roof. With “The nurses” “The Doctors” “The Drugs”!!!

  6. Brilliant! I must sing that song (and I will credit you with authorship!) at our office Relay for Life potluck luncheon on Thursday, which follows my annual diagnostic bilateral mammogram tomorrow afternoon . . . Brilliant! Amazing, as usual. You need to have your OWN show on OWN! Xena, Warrior Princess!

  7. The song is downloadable, Maria!! <3

  8. incredible Kathi!! you’re a complete artist, engaged, graphism AND now sound! love it :)))

  9. This has nothing to do with anything, really, but that Barry Gibb was HOT back then…

  10. I keep listening to their original video to try to figure out how they mixed the vocals…of course, they had an actual recording studio & a sound engineer…

  11. This has to be our Relay team’s theme song! Excellent!

  12. I love this song, and I love YOUR version so much better!! Got great creative juices flowing, and you captured the feelings of those touched by breast cancer (who is everyone, I think) all in a song.

    You ROCK!! Um…I mean you DISCO!!

  13. […] it? But here to lighten up a bit, The Accidental Amazon has remixed the Bee Gees classic ‘Stayin’ Alive‘, and she has recorded herself singing it in an amazing falsetto. Oh the limitless talents of […]

  14. So creative, so true, so maddeningly true! We are tryin’ our best to stay alive. Well done!

    Brenda Coffee

  15. Brilliant, Kathi!


  16. hello from a german amazone 🙂

    and here:
    you can see my tattoo and my selfmade asymetric underwear.

    lot of greets


  17. Kathi, I had a good laugh and then a good cry over those lyrics. Very clever. Also love the pic you posted. You go, girl!

  18. I have just played it to my hubby.. Women you got a hit on your hands.. It’s frank and to the point and does not smooth over the edges. I admire you and if you do a video I know it will kick people into thinking about the true nature of this damned disease. Where can I download this track?.. I would so like it for when I do the Cancer research run in London.. Just to blare out and get me in the mood.. To Kick Arse!

  19. Thanks, everyone! I’m so glad that people are still finding this & listening!

    Jan, I felt the same way when I was working on the recording. I would laugh & I would cry… Hugs to you!

    Sarah, when you play it, there should be a little link under the player bar that says “Download,” and that will let you save it as an mp3 file. Let me know if you have any trouble with it. I would love to get a video together! Believe me, that will be on my agenda this year!!

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